I've been asked lately about how to know when a girl or guy is interested, or if they are just being nice. Where does the line come between being "busy" and "unavailable" to "I'm just not interested in you?"
Good question right? So what is the answer?
I hate to admit it, but females are the worst at this. Guys are pretty straight forward and their feelings are a little easier to decipher. (most of the time)
Girls love attention. I can't tell you how many times I have seen the scenario: a couple dates, texting everyday, invitations to hang out, lunch - all the while the girl is eagerly going along with it. Then when the guy feels like its time to move forward a bit, the girl runs the other way and suddenly becomes "busy."
Girls - what are you doing? Stop and think to yourself for a brief moment. Don't act surprised when a guy wants to move forward in what he thought was the beginning of a relationship. You were eating out of his hand. Texting everyday, going on dates and hanging out says, "I'm interested."
If you are not interested - say so! Who wants to be led along, waste their time, energy, emotions and small budget on a girl like you?
Guys - if a girl says she isn't interested, or isn't returning your phone calls, take a hint. Life is too short to be pining over one girl the rest of your life. Pick up the pieces of your heart and start giving them out to new options. You are still a great catch to another girl and she is waiting to be noticed.
Tried and Truly Yours,
Anabelle
Showing posts with label relationship advice. Show all posts
Showing posts with label relationship advice. Show all posts
Thursday, March 29, 2012
Tuesday, March 27, 2012
"Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."
This post is dedicated to all those who have loved and lost.
I have a friend I met at college a few years ago. She is a beautiful, confident and strong woman. She knows her limits, and uses her strengths to bless and encourage others. She never complains, but instead shares her blessings.
She is the mother of a young son named Hayden. He is her life. Everything she does is for him and she treasures the fact that he is hers forever.
Beka is different from most college students. you wouldn't pick her out of a crowd, or be amazed at what she has accomplished. She is just like the rest of us, except that Beka is a widow. A young widow.
Her and Hayden have been on their own now for over 3 years. She has graduated with her bachelors and continues to set high goals for herself. She looks outward instead of inward and has become one of the most beautiful people I know.
I wonder how many nights she has cried herself to sleep, missed the warmth of her husband and longed to laugh with him. I wonder how many times she has felt alone, not understanding God's perfect plan, and why it is so perfect to him but not to her.
I wonder how many moments she has stopped and remembered the way it felt to be taken care of instead of her taking care of everyone else.
Beka is one of my heros. Of all the people I know, Beka is one that has loved and lost.
She is also the one that has lost all her love in the service of others. Her talents in art, languages, laughing, listening and encouraging have made her one of the most beautiful woman in the world. Not just to me, but to everyone who sees her heart.
In a world where everyone wants to be loved and receive relationship advice, the best advice was given by Alfred Lord Tennyson.
"Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."
Thank you Beka. May your life be filled with as much love as you give.
I have a friend I met at college a few years ago. She is a beautiful, confident and strong woman. She knows her limits, and uses her strengths to bless and encourage others. She never complains, but instead shares her blessings.
She is the mother of a young son named Hayden. He is her life. Everything she does is for him and she treasures the fact that he is hers forever.
Beka is different from most college students. you wouldn't pick her out of a crowd, or be amazed at what she has accomplished. She is just like the rest of us, except that Beka is a widow. A young widow.
Her and Hayden have been on their own now for over 3 years. She has graduated with her bachelors and continues to set high goals for herself. She looks outward instead of inward and has become one of the most beautiful people I know.
I wonder how many nights she has cried herself to sleep, missed the warmth of her husband and longed to laugh with him. I wonder how many times she has felt alone, not understanding God's perfect plan, and why it is so perfect to him but not to her.
I wonder how many moments she has stopped and remembered the way it felt to be taken care of instead of her taking care of everyone else.
Beka is one of my heros. Of all the people I know, Beka is one that has loved and lost.
She is also the one that has lost all her love in the service of others. Her talents in art, languages, laughing, listening and encouraging have made her one of the most beautiful woman in the world. Not just to me, but to everyone who sees her heart.
In a world where everyone wants to be loved and receive relationship advice, the best advice was given by Alfred Lord Tennyson.
"Tis better to have loved and lost than never to have loved at all."
Thank you Beka. May your life be filled with as much love as you give.
Monday, March 26, 2012
Team Peeta or Team Gale?
With the release of HUNGER GAMES this last week, girls are starting to take sides on the controversial question: Team Peeta or Team Gale?
For those who have read the books, it may be harder to take a side. The intense love triangle makes it hard to be on either team. But for those who have seen only the movie, choosing Team Peeta or Team Gale may be just a matter of preference between blonde and brunette.
Who would you choose if you were Katniss Everdeen?
Elizabeth Banks, who plays Effie Trinket in the movie recently shared which team she is on while visiting the Ellen show. See the video below.
Don't forget to leave a comment on Askanabelle-
Team Peeta or Team Gale?
For those who have read the books, it may be harder to take a side. The intense love triangle makes it hard to be on either team. But for those who have seen only the movie, choosing Team Peeta or Team Gale may be just a matter of preference between blonde and brunette.
Who would you choose if you were Katniss Everdeen?
Elizabeth Banks, who plays Effie Trinket in the movie recently shared which team she is on while visiting the Ellen show. See the video below.
Don't forget to leave a comment on Askanabelle-
Team Peeta or Team Gale?
Saturday, March 24, 2012
Should a guy always pay for a date?
You are on your first, second, third date.
Who grabs the check? Does it matter who asked out who?
Check out the video below and share your story with Anabelle at askanabellehere@gmail.com or comment below.
Who should pay for the date?
Who grabs the check? Does it matter who asked out who?
Check out the video below and share your story with Anabelle at askanabellehere@gmail.com or comment below.
Who should pay for the date?
Thursday, March 22, 2012
Virgin Lips
Dear Anabelle,
At 23 I have still not had my first kiss. As I have yet to find out what is wrong with me or all the boys around me, I have decided not to fret. The story which I would like to share with is, therefore, how I successfully avoided a miserable first. Before I begin, I wish to make it clear that I am not a guiltless victim of this date.
I tend to be very trusting. I am grateful for the safety with which I have been blessed, even in my stupidity. As I was preparing to serve a mission, I was working two jobs in the mall. As I worked at one, a young man, "Joe," asked if I had a sister who worked at the local grocer. As my younger sister who looks a lot like me did work there, I assumed that he worked with her. Because of this assumption, I accepted when he invited me out on a date. He was nice & even offered me a ride home from work as I was getting off shortly. Before leaving the mall, I stopped by my other job to check the upcoming week's schedule.
One of my co-workers looked uncomfortable and I asked her what was wrong. "My crazy ex-boyfriend just walked in." Looking around, I saw only Joe. I brushed it aside, knowing that she tended to be overly dramatic. He took me homee. Confession. Perhaps because of lack of experience, whenever I am confronted with any kind of undesired romantic stresses, I get tired. The conflict between not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings and making myself deal with guys in whom I am not interested simply wears me out. Therefore, upon arriving at home, I took a nap. When I awoke, my sister had gotten home from work and told everyone about how Joe had gone to the grocer and bought flowers for me. Without telling anyone, my entire family knew about my suitor.
What was he like? Did I like him? Why had I accepted the date? Was I crazy? When he arrived, he introduced himself to my parents. My dad was not impressed by his baggy pants, tie and T-shirt combo, and three-inch tall mohawk, but we went on our way without much embarrassment. He took me through the Wendy's drive-thru and then to a scenic view of the city- make-out point. I was laughing at his transparency.
He tried to sweep me off my feet with lines that I could have sworn I knew from my favorite romcoms. Now I became giggly at how suave he seemed to think he was. When more people showed up, he decided it would be better to go to a more private location. A smarter, more mature me would have said no, asked to go home, something! The me then was enjoying a funny show. At the new location, he serenaded me while playing the guitar.
When I seemed sufficiently wooed, he ever so romantically asked, "Are you a virgin?" Confession: when things reach a certain level of absurdity, I become very detached. "Yes." "Oh, that's okay." "I know." "Have you ever kissed anyone?" "No." He leaned forward, "Kiss me." "No." "Oh. Why?" "I don't want to." I'm sure there are nicer ways to turn down a guy, but frankly, I didn't think he deserved the courtesy. "Ouch." Within five minutes he was complaining of stomach pains. I am inclined to think that he was just trying to get rid of me after discovering that he would get nowhere with me, except for the truly pained expression on his face.
The whole way home, I sat with a simple prayer in my heart, "Heavenly Father, I really don't want Joe to hurt, but I'm glad I get to go home early." When I got home, my mom told me how my 16 year-old sister had first become acquainted with 22 year-old Joe. He had seen her at work and asked her out on a date. She said no. Love, Lonely Lips P.S. I did learn a lesson from this experience. When, shortly after getting home from my mission, I was asked out by a fifty year-old man talking about past experiences in jail, I, for the first time ever, declined a first date.
At 23 I have still not had my first kiss. As I have yet to find out what is wrong with me or all the boys around me, I have decided not to fret. The story which I would like to share with is, therefore, how I successfully avoided a miserable first. Before I begin, I wish to make it clear that I am not a guiltless victim of this date.
I tend to be very trusting. I am grateful for the safety with which I have been blessed, even in my stupidity. As I was preparing to serve a mission, I was working two jobs in the mall. As I worked at one, a young man, "Joe," asked if I had a sister who worked at the local grocer. As my younger sister who looks a lot like me did work there, I assumed that he worked with her. Because of this assumption, I accepted when he invited me out on a date. He was nice & even offered me a ride home from work as I was getting off shortly. Before leaving the mall, I stopped by my other job to check the upcoming week's schedule.
One of my co-workers looked uncomfortable and I asked her what was wrong. "My crazy ex-boyfriend just walked in." Looking around, I saw only Joe. I brushed it aside, knowing that she tended to be overly dramatic. He took me homee. Confession. Perhaps because of lack of experience, whenever I am confronted with any kind of undesired romantic stresses, I get tired. The conflict between not wanting to hurt anyone's feelings and making myself deal with guys in whom I am not interested simply wears me out. Therefore, upon arriving at home, I took a nap. When I awoke, my sister had gotten home from work and told everyone about how Joe had gone to the grocer and bought flowers for me. Without telling anyone, my entire family knew about my suitor.
What was he like? Did I like him? Why had I accepted the date? Was I crazy? When he arrived, he introduced himself to my parents. My dad was not impressed by his baggy pants, tie and T-shirt combo, and three-inch tall mohawk, but we went on our way without much embarrassment. He took me through the Wendy's drive-thru and then to a scenic view of the city- make-out point. I was laughing at his transparency.
He tried to sweep me off my feet with lines that I could have sworn I knew from my favorite romcoms. Now I became giggly at how suave he seemed to think he was. When more people showed up, he decided it would be better to go to a more private location. A smarter, more mature me would have said no, asked to go home, something! The me then was enjoying a funny show. At the new location, he serenaded me while playing the guitar.
When I seemed sufficiently wooed, he ever so romantically asked, "Are you a virgin?" Confession: when things reach a certain level of absurdity, I become very detached. "Yes." "Oh, that's okay." "I know." "Have you ever kissed anyone?" "No." He leaned forward, "Kiss me." "No." "Oh. Why?" "I don't want to." I'm sure there are nicer ways to turn down a guy, but frankly, I didn't think he deserved the courtesy. "Ouch." Within five minutes he was complaining of stomach pains. I am inclined to think that he was just trying to get rid of me after discovering that he would get nowhere with me, except for the truly pained expression on his face.
The whole way home, I sat with a simple prayer in my heart, "Heavenly Father, I really don't want Joe to hurt, but I'm glad I get to go home early." When I got home, my mom told me how my 16 year-old sister had first become acquainted with 22 year-old Joe. He had seen her at work and asked her out on a date. She said no. Love, Lonely Lips P.S. I did learn a lesson from this experience. When, shortly after getting home from my mission, I was asked out by a fifty year-old man talking about past experiences in jail, I, for the first time ever, declined a first date.
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