Long Distance

Dear Anabelle,

For the last four months, I have been dating a wonderful young man. I met him here at my university and we had a wonderful semester together.

He recently graduated and took a job two states away. I’m devastated. When the semester ended, he decided we should pull back on our relationship and stay in contact, but also date other people. I felt hopeful that he would realize we couldn’t do an open relationship and decide to be a long distance couple.

It’s been two months since he’s been gone. I call him whenever I can, but he seems distant. He reschedules our phone chats often, and when we do talk, he doesn’t seem invested in the conversation. I still love him and want to be with him, but I don’t think I can continue this way. Should I continue to be hopeful or should I let him go?

Sincerely,

Unsure if Distance Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

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Dear Unsure,

The bottom line is, long distance relationships are difficult. If a couple is willing to work hard, then it could be successful, but it doesn’t come without its sacrifices. It seems as though this young man is not willing to make the sacrifices it takes to maintain a long distance relationship. If he asked for an open relationship, it means he’s looking for other options in a companion.

I suggest you pull back. Don’t write or call. If he wants you back, he will work for it. In the meantime, be hopeful that you will find someone willing to go the distance.

Tried and truly yours,

Anabelle